Stony: Here Comes Goodbye
by untamedanime
Summary: Steve always hated Tony. At least that's what he's always thought, but will those feelings change when he's forced to make a life altering decision?
1. Panic

20 feet...

15 feet...

11 feet...

8 feet...

3 feet...

6 inches...almost there.

It was all he could do.

His fellow Avengers were standing there, safely on the ground. Their heads turned to the sky, watching. Simply watching as he plummeted to his inevitable death.

Free falling.

He let out a scream as loud as his lungs would allow, but no one seemed to care...or even hear for that matter.

Closer and closer. The ground's closing in on him ever second. Cold concrete was about to meet warm flesh.

"AHH!"

Heart racing as cold sweat poured down his face and body as he sat straight up in his bed. It was that dream. The same dream he'd been having for the past four months.

They'd never let him live it down if they saw him like this: an emotion wreck of a man the common people call their hero. They were used to him being strong, protecting, and calm.

In front of the other Avengers, now his friends, and on the front line of battle, he was the strength, the heart, one of the brave. He was the Super Soldier. He was Captain America, but now all he was was broken, scared, and lonely.


	2. Can't Escape This Hell

It was so easy for him to act like nothing was wrong when he was in front of the others because no one knew.

No one knew the pain and anguish he faced everyday.

He had to do what was right. Not that he knew what the right decision was, but he had to. Easy to say, hard to do.

Everyday it was the same routine. Wake up from the nightmare, clean up for the day, work out, come home, eat a few bites, shower, go to sleep, repeat.

The only problem is that it didn't feel the same anymore..not since three months ago...when the nightmares started.

This morning he went into the kitchen where the rest of his fellow Avengers sat, getting ready for the meeting Nick was about to conduct.

Nobody seemed to noticed Steve's eyes were red and swollen. Nobody seemed to notice he had bags under them and that he seemed to be losing weight due to lack of nutrients.

At least he thought no one noticed until Natasha sat beside him.

"You okay, Cap?" she whispered

"What do you mean?" acting clueless

"Steve, don't play dumb with me. I can tell something just isn't right with you."

"Natasha, I don't know what you're talking about. I couldn't be better," Steve replies plastering an obvious fake smile on his face.

All Natasha could do was roll her eyes. "Whatever you say." She knew he wouldn't open up to her. She knew it was a losing battle.

I'm not fine. I can't do this any more. Why'd this have to happen? I'm losing my mind. I can't eat. I can't sleep. I'm not even really living. I'm more like a zombie. I can't bring myself to make this choice. Why me? Why couldn't he have told and chosen anyone but me?

Once he came out of his train of thought, he looked around. Everyone was gone. There was nothing but silence. Meeting must be over. As usual he falls back in his routine and goes upstairs, crawls into bed and cries himself to sleep. All the while repeating in his head: why me?


	3. Eyes Wide Open

You say you don't want me

You say you don't care

You say that your heart

Ain't got no room for me there

You say you don't need me

But I know that it's just a lie

'Cause when you call me in the night

Tellin' me your life is better off without me

The rest he sort of just drowned out.

"That was Givin Yourself Away by Ratt," boomed the radio man's voice through the speakers.

So badly Steve wanted to change the station. So badly he wanted to turn the radio off the second he heard the song intro. Instead he sat and listened. After the first four lines he prayed like hell to have the strength to reach his hand out and turn the radio dial. However; something deep within stopped him. Something made him sit and listen, listen to the song, take in the lyrics.

He loved it. It was one of the few songs he'd really grown fond of since being in this decade. Yet he hated it, even going so far as to say he detested it. Just because of the pain and agony that it invoked and the tears that it made him release. It made him realize that he can't live another day without.

As much as he lied to himself, saying it's going to be easy. All I have to say is "no more" and that's it. After hearing this song, he knew that that would be far from the truth.


End file.
